I was at walmart this morning when the gravity of what I did nearly 7 months ago hit me like a train wreck. I started crying and just felt depressed about it. Why was I so stupid? What was I thinking? It really hit me hard. I can't believe I did that. But at the same time, wow, what an eye opener it has proven to be. It helped me seek the help that I was avoiding. It was a mistake that will shape my life forever. I am grateful that I was able to use it as a learning experience and that I was able to get the help that I so desperately needed. I hated feeling the way I did about myself and just in general. I was miserable and very unhappy. I snapped at my husband more often than not and put him through a living hell. I am so sorry for that, it was not my intention to hurt him in any way, shape or form. IT is hard to not let my past define me, but I am trying on a daily basis to learn from it and to press forward.
For the 2nd day in a row I did my 2 mile walk! Feels great! Hopefully my exercising will help my weight start going back down again. I have been trying to watch what I eat. It is hard because I get intense carb cravings with some of the meds I am on. It's like I MUST have carbs and right now, type of cravings. Generally I can squash the cravings but not always.
For the 2nd day in a row I did my 2 mile walk! Feels great! Hopefully my exercising will help my weight start going back down again. I have been trying to watch what I eat. It is hard because I get intense carb cravings with some of the meds I am on. It's like I MUST have carbs and right now, type of cravings. Generally I can squash the cravings but not always.

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