Shades of Sunshine

It's been a while, but I have decided I need the therapeutic effects of keeping my blog up better.  My weight loss journey has been a struggle lately as I have been having Migraine type headaches for 2 months with every day for the past month.  So I haven't pushed the exercise like I should, but I am slowly getting back into an exercise routine.  I have been walking 1 mile every day this week and really watching what I eat and the weight is coming off again.  I have been losing and gaining the same 10# for about a month now, but I am out of the 160's and hoping to keep up with the weight loss and stay strong on the weekends (usually my excuse to eat like crap and more than I should). As for the headaches, after seeing 3 different doctors in one office, I decided to seek help elsewhere as I didn't think they were taking me seriously as far as the treatment or seriousness of them goes.  I have a #10 on the pain scale headache EVERY day now, that is not normal an...

<<<<<< This is my current 'motivational' picture, and my current short term goal (September 25th my 37th birthday).  I was a size 10 and 165# in this picture, my husband was able to life me without breaking his back (he is amazingly strong).  I have a couple of my 'skinny' pictures above my computer so I see them constantly, that's what keeps me going.  I am SO close to my BMI goal (179.5) to get into the 'overweight' class instead of the 'obese' class, as well as so close to being 1/2 way (47.3# loss) to my goal weight!  I have been stalled for the past 3-4 weeks going up and down right around 183, well I have had enough so I decided to go back to what I know works for my body.  The Lean For Life diet.  I follow the book that they have.  I have done it before (in 2004/2005) so I know I can do it again.  I have a new determination right now which feels awesome. I have had a few 'lax' weeks and I know that's wh...

"The struggle you're in today is developing the strength you'll have tomorrow." Author Unknown      "Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength..." I just really like both of these quotes and they totally fit my situation.     I figured it was high time that I posted an update on how I am doing.  It's been a while.  As for my weight loss, I am down to 191.2# as of this morning.  I have lost 33# in about 90 days.  GO ME!  Right now I am in a weight loss contest at work, the pot is about $160.00. My husband keeps telling me if I don't win, Mouse (new kitten we are adopting that I have been fostering) goes in the Rubbage bin.....cause her adoption fee/bloodwork/catheter before her spay is about $150.00 LOL!  Anyways I am already on the weight loss bandwagon so why not win?  LOL!  I am down I thi...

Homemade Hand Sanitizer 1/3 cup Aloe Gel 2/3 cup Rubbing Alcohol 8-10 drops essential oil (I used Peppermint & Lavender) 1-  Measure out ingredinets into a bowl, using a funnel pour into an empty bottle, shake well :)

2 Cups Brown Sugar 1 cup liquified Coconut Oil 1 t avocodo oil 1 t apricot kernel oil 1 t Vit E 20-30 drops essential oils (I used Lemon, Lavender, Grapefruit, Peppermint 1-  Mix all the ingredients together until well blended 2-  Keep in a glass jar (if using citrus essential oils). 3-  Use liberally to scrub body in the shower.

Base Mix: 1 Cup Colloidal (ground up) oatmeal 1/2 cup Almond Flour 1/2 cup Hazelnut Flour 2-3 Tablespoons Chamomile Flowers 2-3 Tablespoons Lavender Flowers Grind up in blender ( I store my extra just in a rubbermaid plastic container)   Actual Mixture: Take about 1/4-1/2 cup of the Base Mix (recipe above) 2 Tablespoons Honey (benefits of Honey HERE ) 1 t Apricot Kernel Oil 1 t Avocodo Oil 1 t Vitamin E Oil 10-20 drops Essential Oils (I used peppermint, lavender, lemon, grapefruit) 1-  Mix all the ingredients together 2-  I keep mine in a canning jar in my shower and scrub my face with it every morning This mix usually lasts me about a week or so with daily scrubbing of my face.

1/4 cup coconut oil 1/4 cup baking soda 1 Tbsp Sea Salt 1/8 cup hydrogen peroxide 20-30 drops Peppermint Essential Oil 1-  Mix all ingredients with fork, stir until blended.

1 Cup Coconut Oil 1/3 Cup Shea Butter 1 T Apricot Kernel Oil 1 T Avocodo Oil 1 T Vit E Oil 10-20 Drops essential Oils (I used Peppermint, Lemon & Lavender) 1-  Mix all ingredients in a bowl, whip with mixer for 5-10 minutes until light and fluffy 2-  May store in fridge if it's too warm in your house so it doesn't melt.

1 Cup Coconut Oil 1/4 cup Cocoa butter 1 T avocodo oil 1 T apricot kernel oil 1 T Vitamin E Oil 20-30 Drops Essential Oils  ( I used a combo of Lemon, Peppermint, Orange & Lavender) 1-  Mix all ingredients in a bowl, whip with mixer for 5-10 minutes until light & Fluffy 2-  If using citrus oils store in glass container.

  So on Wednesday I discovered an AWESOME find!  Essential oils for weight loss.  I am down 3.2# since wednesday which is when I started the oils, I have been stalled and going up/down/up for the past week to 10 days so I am super excited.  I am using Lemon, Peppermint and Grapefruit both orally and topically.  I take 4 drops of each in 16oz of water/iced tea and drink one after breakfast for my morning pick me up and one after lunch for my afternoon energy.  They are amazing!  I am not as hungry as I normally am, and I feel pretty great too.  It definitely gives me a pep.   You do have to be careful with what oils you use as some are not safe for ingestion and are not pure.  I recommend and am using Young Living's Essential Oils.  Also if you dilute in water/tea etc you have to use a metal or glass water bottle as the oils can leach the toxins out of plastic.  On another note starting to use the essential oils has woken...

  <<<<<< Love it!  Almost 3 weeks ago my husband sent me that dreadful text that made me wake up and say "Hey, I'm fat, and there is something I can do about it instead of just buying bigger clothes".  I made that choice to take the chance to make the change!  I couldn't be happier!  I have already dropped 17#, lost 5.4" and dropped my BMI almost 2 points (I am actually in a lower class now instead of Obesity Class 2 I am Obesity Class 1).  I have made my choice and I couldn't be happier.  I have really been pushing the exercise this week, I have exercised all 5 days this week.  And exercised today to start off the new week. A couple things that have REALLY helped me, and things I have learned so far in this journey are: 1-  FOOD LOG-   I have started recording EVERYTHING I eat, including the butter I use to cook my foods in.  Holy crap was that ever eye opening.  I have decided as much as possible I am g...

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I love this quote!  It is very true.  The longer I am on this diet, the easier it is becoming to keep on it and stick to it.  It is becoming second nature to prepare healthier meals.  Another quote I found that I really like is: Giving up your goals because of one set back is like slashing your other three tires because you got a flat.  I tend to do this all the time.  If I gain weight or so instead of sticking it out, I quit and then end up gaining it all back.  I am bound and determined to make this my last 'diet' aka Lifestyle change for good, meaning no more yo-yoing.  I am going to eat healthy and watch my carbs and exercise regularly.   I have to make it my routine.  Much like I am making keeping my house/kitchen clean my routine.  I come home from work, empty my lunch containers and my hubby's into the sink to soak while cooking dinner.  Then I do the dishes and load others that can go into it into the dishwasher....

Today was my day off, and boy did I have a major case of the hungries!  I was freaking starving most of the day.  But I managed to stick to the plan.  I didn't exercise like I wanted to today, but I will get back on track with the exercising on Wednesday and keep up with it.  I am trying to sell my tablet, so I can get the cell version, so trying not to deck it out like crazy but boy am I tempted too.  Oh well, I can just deck out the new one.  I was reminded of an app I used to love using earlier today it's called "Lose It" it's really good it keeps track of what you eat and you can have weight loss goals etc.  You can pay for more features, but I just have the basic.  I really like it cause you can chose what nutrients it tracks such as carbohydrates etc.  If you are interested you can find it here:  https://www.loseit.com/  I have to get back on track with the exercise, I only exercised 1x last week.  So that is m...

Today was my protein day.   This is what I ate Breakfast: an egg, a tbsp heavy whipping cream, pinch cheese. Morning snack: 9 carbs blueberry Greek nonfat yogurt Lunch: 0 carbs 3 & 1/2 oz pork ribs Afternoon snacks: 2 carbs 16 slices  pepperoni, 2 oz sharp cheddar, 1/4  cup pecans Dinner: 6 oz tilapia Evening snack: 9 pork rinds Today was a bit stressful, I finally blocked the very toxic person on Facebook last night. I woke up to a text message on my phone, never gave her my phone number,  a message from her dogs account on Facebook, and an email from this person, so I sent her an email and told her not to contact me again, and got two more emails today from this nut job.   I c got home from work and was in an incredibly good mood which was great, has some playfulness with the hubby, and enjoyed spending some time with him tonight.  It is amazing the relief I feel tonight not having to chat on Facebook with this person.  I got my n...

Weight week 1:  224.4#  Down 10.2#  BMI was 37.38 last week, now with a 10.2# loss it is 35.7! Woot Woot! Getting healthier. I am going to have to kick it in high gear this week as it is TOM.  TODAYS MENU: Breakfast: Total Carbs: 13.97  1 egg cooked in microwave with 1 Tbsp Heavy Whipping Cream, a pinch of cheese and some garlic, salt and pepper. 1/2 cup of corn chex, Morning Snack : Light Greek Non Fat Peach Yogurt Total Carbs: 8   Lunch: Total Carbs: 26.29      2 cups mixed greens w/pinch of cheese, 6 cherry tomatoes, 1-2 Tbsp cucumber, 2 Tbsp blue cheese dressing, 1 cup california blend veggies, 1 orange, 1/2 cup sloppy joe mix (sugar free). Afternoon Snack: 4 carbs  1/2 cup Cottage Cheese Dinner: Total Carbs 22.75  3 & 1/2 oz Pork Ribs, 2 cups mixed greens w/pinch of cheese, 6 cherry tomatoes, 1-2 Tbsp cucumber, 2 Tbsp ranch dressing, 1/2 cup broccoli, 1/2 cup spinach, 1 orange   Evening Snack...

Today was a bit of a frustrating day, I had to run to Walmart because our downstairs basement drain was flooded/clogged.  So I picked up like $40 in draino type products LOL, it took 3 different kinds to finally get it somewhat unclogged, then it still isn't all the way unclogged.  I didn't start doing the laundry (need to do 3 loads) until 6pm.....then it came flooding back up the drain some so I couldn't do the other loads that I needed to.  So we are going to put MORE draino down the drain tonight and let it work overnight, then we shall see.  I was really worried about how I would do today as I was off and home most of the day, usually the weekends/days off are when I sabotage myself where the diet is concerned.  So I am quite proud of myself in that regard.  I even 'portioned' out tortilla chips for my husband in sandwich bags, and didn't even sneak a tiny piece of one, normally I would have had a few myself.  I found Fat Secret's Calorie Counter ...

So I want to do a quick run down and then will expound on each area: 1-  Example for my husband 2-  Scrubs Fit Better 3-  More Energy 4-  Better Body Image/Less Depression about it 5-  Lower Blood Pressure 6-  Better Health 7-  Trying to Conceive 8-  Doctor Recommended it 1-  Example for my husband:   I love my husband to death.  He is considered Morbidly Obese (heck so am I) and he has a lot of issues due to his weight (high blood pressure, sleep apnea (may be genetic component too), Diabetes uncontrolled), retaining water in legs etc.  I want to lose this weight so we can both be healthier, and I want to be a good example to him as far as portion sizes go, healthy meals and snacks.  We both have a tendancy to not care about portion sizes and take way too much food, then we complain about belly aches or "I ate too much" later.  If we are more careful about portion sizes we will lose weight.  We have bo...

So after much debate I have decided to mish mash my Bipolar (this one) and my Weight Loss blogs together as a friend pointed out a very important part:  " Combine, the weight loss is part of the bipolar it changes you mentally."  Which is VERY VERY true, being fat makes me have a poor self esteem which makes me depressed which is part of the Bipolar.  So I am going to keep the 2 blogs together on this one.  I honestly feel this is the best plan.  So I hope you will continue to follow my journey.  Today was an INSANE day at work we were so busy, had surgeries and procedures and were double booked with appointments pretty much all day.  I didn't get much scanning done, (That's my project scanning consent forms and bloodwork for the past many years) but boy did I move around a lot, I think I got my exercise in today just helping customers taking them to the back and fetching the technicians to see rooms, and then checking on the patients when owners call...

EEKS!  Here are my before pictures.....Front, Side and Back!  Man my rear is HUGE! 

 So today I started my exercise plan.  I was really hungry and just wanted to eat before I did, and after I wasn't so hungry.  If that's all it takes I will exercise every day!  LOL.  I love the Walk At Home DVD's by Leslie Sansone.  This morning I walked a mile....going to work myself up to 2 or 3 miles eventually.  So that is good.  I really feel more energetic and happy today since I exercised.  I am planning on exercising 5 days a week.   I took a 'before' picture of my face so I can see the difference as I lose weight.  Will have my hubby help with full body shots UGH tonight when I get home from work. So this is the conversation I had with my hubby last week that really hit home: Me:  Seriously need new scrub pants, all my pants make my legs hurt Him:  Why do they make your legs hurt? Me:  Cause I am too fat...they are too small Him:  Sounds like a personal issue, isn't there a better solution than b...

Here Goes Nothing....here are my horrendous stats..... Weight: 224.6# BMI = 37.28 kg/m 2   Obese Because I have high blood pressure, I am considered Morbidly Obese Normal BMI range: 18.5kg/m 2 - 25 kg/m 2 Normal BMI weight range for the height: 111.2lbs - 150.2 lbs Measurements Neck 14" Bust 42" across 36 & 1/2 underneath Waist 39" Hips 49" L Thigh 29 & 1/2" R Thigh 29 & 1/4" L Calve 19 & 1/2" R Calve 19 &1/2" L Arm 15 & 1/2 R Arm 15" So today was a day full of temptations, one of the reps brought us einstein bagels, I LOVE bagels.  Granted I should not be eating them anyways as I am on a Gluten Free Diet, but I tend to cheat....A LOT!  Maybe my gassy belly would be better if I didn't.  So they sat in the break room at work.  I eat my lunch in the breakroom so there they were BAM right in front of me tempting the hell out of me!  I resisted and had my tuna fish and hard boiled egg for lunch t...

So starting the ole diet tomorrow.  I start off with 3 days of protein only having 6-12 servings of protein throughout the day.  This picture shows what I have planned.  I am going to kick this!  Today I spent the day overeating as usual.  I had about 10 servings of popcorn, 3 snack bags of trail mix, probably 3 or 4 servings of tortilla chips with cheese, 1 almond snack bar, spaghetti for dinner with a salad and yes I watched portions.  I don't know what my problem is.  Okay yes I do I have the seroquel hunger pains.  I have heard so many people who have gained so much weight on that pill.  I can't wait until I get off of it.  Right now I am on 200mg per day from 400mg.  So far (since last Tuesday) I haven't noticed much of a difference in my appetite, if anything it seems bigger.  I don't know if I feel anxiety on my day off or not, I do know I am dealing with a particularly difficult person on facebook, literally stalks me...

It has been 6 months since my last post.  A lot has changed since then.  I got a job that I LOVE.  I worked with a friend about 10+ years ago and she is now the manager of a very successful Veterinary hospital, she was looking for a Veterinary Receptionist, so I got the job after being interviewed by the Office Manager and Vet, and taking some tests :)  I really like it and it has done wonders for my anxiety and other issues.  I really enjoy working there.  As for my bipolar, I have been pretty stable since last Summer.  I am on Seroquel and Wellbutrin.  I have however gained 40# on the Seroquel since I started the increased dose in November.  So I talked with my Psychiatrist last week and we are going to try to wean me off of it and find a different mood stabilizer that doesn't have the weight gain properties.  I have also been diagnosed with High Blood Pressure which I am sure is weight related.  I am on blood pressure pills now...