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It's no secret

It's not secret that I have a very poor self esteem.  I have little to no confidence in my abilities, and I have self image issues.  It is something that my counselor and I are/will be working on.  I am really trying to have more confidence.  I am really feeling confident about my grooming skills as I haven't had any legitimate complaints and I've now bee grooming for almost 3 months full time.

I have PTSD because of several instances that have happened in my life (go read my 'about me page' and my Autobiography to find out more).  I just recently discovered I had PTSD, as I have a physical reaction when I see someone who caused me a lot of grief growing up for very long.  I am working on it, I do love this person, but the past did happen and it's something I really need to get through with the help of my counselor.

Sometimes I think I'm so messed up I need a service dog to help keep me 'sane' so to speak.  I often wonder if it would help me with my anxieties and panic episodes.  I never know when they are going to hit, where I will be, what I will be doing etc.  I have read that a service dog could sense these triggers etc....however I could never afford one fully trained.  I am really thinking about it though.  I hae high levels of anxiety.  Even though my surgery isn't until next week I am already having anxiety and worrying about it, but I have faith and trust my Dr that all will be okay.  I just can't help it.
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